Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
its not stalking. its research.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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