He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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