why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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