I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
