Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
