I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
please don't ironically join a cult
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