1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
