$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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