Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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