Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize