i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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