id be glad to
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
