she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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