Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
