real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
