Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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