I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
