I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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