u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize