Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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