guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize