i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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