I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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