Will you blow on my dice?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
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