he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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