I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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