Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
do herpes really smell.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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