wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he puts the penis in happiness.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
