Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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