I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
