Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize
