actually, I'm a sock model
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
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