I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
