I'm gonna have a badass scar
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize