I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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