at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
