I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I wish there were birth control emojis
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
