are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize