Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize