all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
