Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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