I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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