i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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