We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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