i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
