The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I think i got beer on your cat.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
