so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
