Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize