But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
