Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
