I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
